Monday, April 18, 2011

Fingers crossed

It is so incredibly hard having a child with, what I am assuming is, multiple personalities.  You dread public, you are embarrassed when people come to your house and witness your "situation," you pray and pray that he behaves when he is with other people and freak yourself out trying to plan for any and all personalities that may present themselves in your absence.  You over prepare and over accomodate and try to explain every different personality and how that particular one likes to be dealt with.  Its exhausting.

Nice Joey is content just sitting there looking out the window, personality #34 likes to be held all day, personaility #21 likes to look at himself in the mirror and smile (but you have to be holding him at a certain angle to accomplish this), Joey #12 likes to be read to, but don't try and doing that with Joey #4 or you will be sorry.  Joey #6 likes to cuddle but Joey #27 would rather lay in his bed alone.

You can imagine how hard it is to try and explain this to someone else.  So, we don't.  We try not to let Joey hang out with anyone who hasn't known him since birth, and has thus been introduced to most of his 583 personalities.  This is extremely limiting as you can assume.  And basically the only person we can turn to is Shannon.  But I even have to remind her not to shake him if she gets too frustrated. 

So, today Joey has a date with Grandma.  Probably for a total of 3 hours, most of which, will be outside.  Something most of Joey's 583 personalities like.  But, I am fearful that he will do something and freak the eff out and give my mother a run for her money.  Then she'll hate him and think he's an asshole.  Then I'll be sad because no one wants their kid to be an asshole, especially to their Grandma. 

So I will spend the rest of the day sweating and anticipating the "your kid is an asshole," text.  I hope Joey shocks the hell out of me, but I am definitely not holding my breath. 

Fingers crossed. 

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