SOS

Rick jinxed us.

Joe has been sleeping through the night for the past month and a half.  Its been heaven.  More than heaven, its like imagining the greatest thing in the world, and then having that thing.  We finally could rely on a solid 8 hours of sleep. 

Throughout this month and a half, Rick and I were fully aware of what was happening, but we made damn sure we didn't talk about it.  If you talk about it and acknowledge it, you jinx it.  So we were silently enjoying our full nights of sleep, and it was everything we hoped it would be.

Then it happened. 

Rick talked about it.  Maybe he thought enough time had gone by and we were now out of the jinxing time frame.  Maybe he just missed waking up in the middle of the night to a WIDE AWAKE baby. 

Maybe he's just an ass.

I'm not kidding you, the VERY next night after Rick spoke about the unmentionable, Joe stopped sleeping through the night.  It started with a 4 am wide awake session, and then it was a 2:30 am wide awake session and last night it was a 3:30 wide awake session.

JINXED.

Now, how do you undo this?  Do I have to make a potion with Rick's blood, dragon breath and the hair of a virgin (do those exist anymore!)?

Help.

SOS

He's a fishy

It was love at first sight.

Joe and the water are one.  They love each other and have a fantastic relationship. 

Needless to say, day one of swim lessons were a huge success.  Joe was the only tiny kid that instantly started splashing around and squealing with delight.  One kid cried the whole time, another just sat there and clung on to their dad and others just weren't as cute as Joe.  Duh.

Here's a video and some pics.  The video is sideways because that's what you get when you leave Rick in charge of picture/video duties. 

We had fun. 

Got my trunks on, and a baba for the road, cause I have been eating an 8 oz bottle

every hour for a week now. oy

Checking it out. 

Yay!  Fun in the water!!

Snapshots, because I'm exhausted.

Today you get pictures because I am too tired to come up with anything clever about my LONG ass weekend.  Rick was gone from 8:30 am to 10:45 pm on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, so I had Joe to myself all day and night.  I am beginning to think now that this was Rick's clever way of showing me how much I need him around...hmmmm....

Anyway, mom, kid weekend..........

TRAPPED!  I actually had to whip out the baby gate.

Beach day at Richmond Beach.  Joe had about 6 layers of sunscreen on.  Safety first!

I tried to put that basket behind the recliner because he crawls back there and tries to lick wires.  So what does he do, he moves the basket.  Of course. 

We're bored.  And the only way to get Joe to stop making noise is to do random shit to him.  Like put blocks on his head.

Then there was the task of doing laundry while there is a baby crawling around or in your lap....

This kid had me moving non-stop for three days.  Rick, we need you, we like you, and please don't ever go anywhere without us ever again.  Please and thank you. 

The Jesus factor

We are on the hunt for a new daycare.  For a wide variety of reasons, but mainly because we need a provider with more structure.  Our current lady is great and we love that she didn't send us packing a long time ago.  But, she is seriously lacking in the structure department.  And if Joe's difficult road thus far is any indication of future behavior, we are going to be needing some reinforcements. 

So, I've found a place.  Seems great, nice website, very polite and quickly responding director, affordable and close proximity to our house.......and......its a Christian daycare (insert dun dun dunnnnnn).

For me, this is not an issue.  For Rick, this is a huge issue. 

I don't know what scares him the most about this, but from what I've gathered, he has a big issue with them "lying" to Joe.  And he thinks we are going to have to "undo" all the horrible damage that comes from singing songs about Jesus. 

I on the other hand don't think they will be reading these kids scripture 24/7 and throwing God and the Bible and all that crap down his tiny acidy throat.  I envision them using God as sort of a moral compass and teaching kids to treat others how they want to be treated and just living a moral life (irony: child out of wedlock...doh!).  I don't think stories about Noah's Ark are going to lead to hours and hours of therapy later down the road. 

So, we are at our first major parenting road block.  And, its a doosey. 

We have a tour scheduled for Friday so we'll see how churchy it really is.  And, maybe they won't even want us heathens anyway. 

Bananas and Bears

What do bananas and bears have in common?  Both suck. 

Bananas more so for Joe...

Bears more so for the momma.....

Conclusion:  No more banana's for Joe and no more bears for Joe and the momma.  Both suck and both can go double b.

I think this is where the weight loss begins

I have a feeling I will never ever be able to sit down and rest ever again.  No more turning my back and trusting that Joe will be in the same place.  No more sitting down and taking a load off.  The foreseeable future looks a tad bit exhausting and includes tons of movement.

This morning I came downstairs to find Joe chewing on remotes while Rick slept in the recliner.  Shoot dirty look at Rick and then take Joe up to sit in my bathroom while I take a shower.  This usually is very hit or miss.  This morning, very much so a miss.  He promptly crawled over to the toilet and I swear to god almost licked it.  Rick is now asleep in the bed.  Grrrr. 

We avoid toilet licking and I get out of the shower and go to change his diaper.  Diaper changed, turn around to grab some socks and he tries to make me  piss myself by launching himself off his changing table.  I caught his first leg and quickly lay him back down. 

Socks on, baby on floor.  Momma needs to put some clothes on.  Not more than 5 seconds later I hear a rustle of plastic coming from the other room.  Run in there half dressed and see baby Joe had found the wrapper his diapers came in and was trying to commit suicide by shoving the plastic bag in his mouth.  I know, stupid idiot parents for having that in his reach.  I KNOW, trust me, I know. 

Third crisis averted and we have hit 7 am.  Put make-up on and catch Joe trying to real deal crawl, with knees...so proud....

Then we venture downstairs to make the coffee, feed the doggy, take doggy potty, etc....btw, Rick still in bed.  Lame.

Take doggy out to go potty, Joey in bouncy chair....

Come back in from potty and catch the tail end of this almost disaster...



Basically, by the time I had left for work I was ready for bed again.  The kid cannot sit still.  We are seriously in for it when those two monster feet hit the ground running. 

Take pity on us.

Big sigh....

While I might have a hard time convincing some of you I am not crazy, I now have medical proof!!  Booya, in your face Rick!  [Insert happy dance here]

So, I followed up with my doctor about my overwhelming fatigue.  We discussed possible causes of this (causes besides 7 month old highly volatile son) and ran some tests.  She said it sounded like a low lying physical depression (booooooo), but wanted to run some tests to make sure.  So she did a complete blood count, looked at my iron levels, and checked to make sure my thyroid was working properly. 

What we found out was my iron levels are really low.  And that surprised her because I had told her about the new high in red meat diet I had been on.  So she said if I wasn't eating all the meat I have been eating that I would have dangerously low iron levels.  Which, she says, accounts for a lot of how I am feeling.  And she said once one thing is out of whack everything else works overtime and then I just end up a psycho bitch.  Or something to that effect.

SO!  No depression, just a pretty gnarly iron deficiency.  Which now means I get to take iron, which, if you've ever had to take iron, you know sucks balls.

This makes me happy. 

Just to make sure I get everything straight though, I think I am going to had some herbal remedies to my repertoire.  Starting with St. John's Wort and Melatonin.  Hopefully those, combined with the iron will make everything copacetic again and we will have a happier momma...and daddy.